Wednesday, March 31, 2010

My Passion


My passion is, and has been for a long time, becoming the Christian that the Bible teaches us we can become. At a very early age I began to read the Bible. In my teens I began to study the Bible. In my late teens I began to question the Bible and explore other religions. That is another story but, after coming full circle, the only thing that made any real sense and seemed to be a puzzle with all the pieces was that the Bible is indeed true and therein contains the "what" and the "how." Not always do I see the "why" the way I want to but the main "why" is very clearly defined therein: God is love and that is what he wants us to be.


The definition for passion is love. That's the simplest definition. The use of the term passion to intonate the sufferings of Christ during his crucifixion is not an incorrect use of the word; it is simply not used that way anymore. So, when I refer to passion, I am referring to the one thing I love the most, the one thing that drives me and keeps me going no matter what. That one thing is to become the Christian that the Bible says is possible

Now, you would think that I should say my family or my friends are my passion. They are. I love them dearly. But, we all have a passion that defines us and determines who and what we are. My passion determines the kind of wife, mother, friend, community member that I am. At least I want that to be so.

 
In my exploration of other religions, secular humanism was my favorite. I really liked the idea that we could be our own god, picking and choosing from a variety of ideologies the facets of each ideology that would best suit us as individuals. 

I ran into a problem, though. Actually, I ran into a couple of problems. There were no religions or ideologies that were so incomplete that I could choose only a dab of this and a dab of that. Trying to do so created many conflicts in ideology. The one thing I new about God was that, given the beauty and order of creation, there was no way that defining him as he relates to me should be so confusing and complicated.

What if God did not create the earth and we just happened? That would settle a lot of things for me. I tried really hard to go with that but that left me with many different versions of evolution and that, too, was confusing. Is science was so darn the answer, why did the "facts" keep changing? I could not let go of God over something so confusing. I ended up back to the Biblical explanation of creation because, as simple as it seems, it made much more sense than evolution. I've heard some say that it takes more faith to believe in evolution that it takes to believe that God, through the power of who he is, created the universe; I found that to be true.

But what about God himself? OK. So he was this big entity that could create. Why did he bother? Why did he create humans? And why, oh why, did he create such beauty and there be such suffering and pain in the middle of it all. WHY?

Now let's come back to today, and leave that question for just a bit. What is my passion? Again, to become the Christian that the Bible says is possible. Why? Love. The realization that God loves me brought me to a place of humble heartedness in the middle of a set of circumstances that, looking back, makes some folks walk away from God. What I found was that, in my worst condition, God loved me and wanted to heal my broken life, my devastated soul, and wounded heart. I had a choice. I could hate him for allowing me to suffer but I so desperately needed him. Only his love and his power could change me on the inside and I knew it. If I walked away from him I would not have been able to survive the pain in my life. Thoughts of suicide dominated me for a few years. I knew that I could not continue on the path of anger towards the only one that could save my soul. He turned out to be the one who loved, and still loves me, more than any human ever.

This is all a bit subjective sounding up 'til now. But, if you consider how people choose to believe these days, subjectivism is not my biggest concern. Resentment toward God, blaming God, turning away from God, almost killed me and quite certainly is killing many people today. God didn't spare them or their loved ones from suffering so, they hate him. God didn't meet them on their terms so they just decided he doesn't exist, or they create a god of their own, a religion or ideology to suit them, and cut themselves off from the very thing they truly want and need: love.

In John 5:20 and John 14:12 Jesus stated that those who love him would do even greater works than he did. WHAT? What could be greater than the miracles, the deliverances, the giving of his very life to pay the penalty for the sin of mankind so humanity could once again be united in loving fellowship with our father, our creator? What has become of THAT kind of Christianity? Why do we settle for religion that downplays who and what the Bible says we are and can be?

I'm going to end with those questions for now. Read those verses. And read Romans chapter 5 again and let’s come back here tomorrow and have a little chat.

Love with all my heart,
MtnMom
Copyright C.Jacobs-3/2010 (ALL RIGHTS RESERVED)




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